Tuesday, May 15, 2018

979: Hard day

It is 11:19pm.

I should be in bed. Gabriel has an appointment in Shreveport in the morning, which I should have known better than to schedule so early... but here we are and it is too late to do anything about it now.

Today was a very emotionally hard day for me. I found out I probably can't do Yoga anymore, the kids were behaving terribly, the cat still won't eat and I just found myself in a downward spiral of overwhelming doubt and fear that I will never get out of the place I feel so stuck in.

Thankfully, I did manage to crawl out of the hole a little this afternoon and while I got away from it all to go to Walmart (of all places), I found some inspiration and came back ready to work on Elijah smiles again.

And even better, I had a session with a wonderful coach who is patient and kind, and is helping me work on myself and love myself more because I still have lots of walls up all over the place and a lot of hard stuff to work through. But the point is that I am trying to be better.

I should probably get some rest. I hope you are all having a beautiful night. I love you.

Go change the world. Do it for Elijah <3


I don't think you could have been anymore perfect.
Beautiful boy. I love and miss you so so so much.
Always.
<3 

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