So I got unfriended today...and at first, it hurt. I was upset and angry and really just couldn't understand how something I did so innocently, made someone so turned off by me that they had to unfriend me AND not allow me to send them an apology.
But after obsessing over it all dang day, I've come to realize, it's not really about me and this whole situation holds some valuable lessons:
Lesson #1: You can't please everyone all the time, and you will make mistakes.
I have tried several business adventures and the hardest part for me is always "sales" because it always comes with a swift and fast "no." lol.
Today I focused on my goal of selling 15 services, and earning a certain amount of income before the week was over--because I wanted to better myself for myself, and my family. So I sent invitations/messages to many people on Facebook for my weightloss hypnotherapy sessions who lived in the area...not because I thought they were in need of the services personally...just because my classes are in this area. I accidentally sent a few invites to people out of the area, because my computer was scrolling so slow and their name probably looked similar to someone elses, and I have sick children, and I was trying to multi task....I was a little distracted. My bad.
ANYWAYS, getting to the point. I KNEW going into this, I would be hearing a lot of no's...or getting a lot of no answers. I'm cool with that, understanding that this is not something that everyone needs or wants in their lives is important when doing sales work. HOWEVER, the reason behind the unfriending came because one of the people I messaged said she had a different philosophy on weight loss than me and she said her weight loss journey was complete. I clearly missed something when I sent her the request, because I did see her profile picture and she was quite in shape. Kudos to her! I was prepared to apologize, but here is where all the anger and upset came in....she had already unfriended me and Facebook said I could not send her any messages.
I am working on not taking this personal...which is actually the next lesson and I will get into that in a moment...but this is maddening to me. How can people unfriend/unfollow/block people just because they MIGHT share a different set of beliefs that themselves? Do I believe that hypnotherapy is the ONLY component to weight loss? No! I am at the gym every day busting my ass, sweating, and sometimes crying because I am pushing my body to be stronger, and to lose the weight. I am changing the way I eat too. Hypnotherapy does not replace those things, nor is it some sort of dark magic, Satan's work, or witch craft. It is a tool that helps retrain your brain to be better disciplined. This helps eliminate self doubts about the gym, struggles with self control when it comes to dieting, or the parts of you that believe you are not worth the work. It is mental work, which is just as important as physical work. Some people struggle with these things, and hypnotherapy is a great tool to help them work these issues out in a loving supportive environment. It can be life changing!
Whether this was about hypnotherapy and weight loss or something else, when we hide the people in our lives who have different "philosophies," than our own, we miss out on an opportunity to learn from them. They miss out on an opportunity to learn from us. And when we are so absorbed in being "right" about something in an argument that we don't give the other person a chance to speak their piece OR ask for forgiveness, we leave room for misunderstandings to grow, and peace to dwindle.
I never meant to offend this girl and wish her well. But I do hope that in the future, she learns to open her heart and eyes to others who think differently than herself. I have learned that diversity in thought is a true gift.
Lesson #2: Don't take things personally. It's probably not you.
Okay, I'm not saying this to be all high and mighty...it's just kind of something I have learned over the years. When someone unfriends you out of the blue like this, not allowing any conversation about it, it is more about their insecurities than your faults. Ouch. That sounds rough...but hear me out.
Allowing my message (which was just a cheesy sales tactic aimed at selling my own product to try and help support myself and my family), to offend her says way more about this girl, than it does about me. I feel like she took my sales pitch personal...which it never was meant to be.
Maybe she was insulted that I didn't see her profile picture that showed how in shape she was and thought I was calling her fat--which I was not. I didn't address anyone specifically because of their weight...like I said earlier it was a location thing and a few accidental sends because of distractions.
Maybe she thought I was insulting her ways of doing fitness/healthy eating...again I was not. I was only to try a cool product that I adore dearly.
Maybe she thought because I believe that hypnotherapy works, I did not align with her spiritual beliefs--and she thinks down on people who use hypnotherapy????
Who knows. I don't. Which is why it isn't about me.
It took me far too long to shake all of this today, and that is where my personal problem comes in. I allowed her personal choice to get offended by me, offend me. Lol. Writing that out just sounds really silly doesn't it?
We cannot control the thoughts and actions of others. They are not our decision to make. Therefor, we should not feel responsible for them nor should we allow them to alter our state of minds. We pick our peace.
Lesson #3: Let it go. Let them go.
I hate that this happened, and I hate that someone would take offense to something so innocent. BUT, I have let myself carry this anger and disappointment for far too long today. Although, the anger did make for an awesome push at the gym, it has eaten too much of my personal peace and time today.
I'm letting her go. Let her find her own peace. Let her do her own thing. I wish her love and happiness. I also wish myself the same. Now that it is out of my head, I feel much better.
Sometimes it is just time to let people go---it is always time to let the anger go.
I've got stuff to do, a family to support, money to make, and a world to change.
When I say I love you all, I truly mean it. I hope you know that.
Go change the world.
Do it for Elijah.
Thank you.
Am I silly for even letting this bother me?
The answer is yes lol.
I just hate that your story is touching one less life...
but no worries,
I will find others.
I will change the world for you sweet boy.
I love and miss you
Always.
<3
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