2 Questions

It is 11:33am

I feel like the biggest idiot in the world. (Yep, it is a 2 blog day....)

I didn't get the job with Shipt because I missed 2 multiple choice questions on a test I had to take with my interview.

I have never been good with tests, and I was so nervous and excited when taking this one.

I thought for sure this job was going to be the answer to so many of my problems right now.

After calling my mom crying, I contacted the recruiters to ask when I can reapply again, and the lady told me that "at this time" they were not accepting reapplications...EVER. (but to check back in a few months to see if their policy changes).

How does someone who goes grocery shopping almost everyday in her entire life fail a test about grocery shopping?

I asked the recruiter what went wrong.

I missed 2 questions. That was it.

And the 2 questions I missed were ridiculous.

The first one I missed was about cheese.

They asked if my customer asked for Sargento sharp cheddar cheese would you get:
a. this cheese (i don't remember)
b. store brand sharp cheddar cheese
c. that cheese (I don't remember)
d. Sargento cheddar slices

I knew I was wrong when I clicked D, but I had already moved forward and there was nothing I could do.

But what a STUPID question.

First of all, I have never been to any store and seen any sort of shortage of any sort of Sargento cheese.

Second of all, if there was, there is this magical device called a cellphone where I could have texted/called the customer and asked what they would like in place of the cheese the store was out of.

The other question was about ground meat and it was just another stupid mistake....I don't even want to get into it..

I am just tired.

So tired.

I needed this.

I cant do Uber because I don't have a new car, and I need the flexibility of a job like this. Especially with me homeschooling the kids.

It would have helped so much.

I hate this. I have been doing so good. And now I am sitting here on my couch, crying my eyes out, and am feeling so lost.

Now I feel like we are just going to be homeless forever, and I am never going to be able to climb out this hole I have dug myself into... (sorry to be so overdramatic...)

It was more to me than just getting this job. It was me being brave enough again to do any sort of work. And I was so proud of myself for that.

After Elijah passed away returning to a "conventional job" where I had to be stuck in one spot for 8 hours, and having no time to breathe if I needed it, it all sounded really scary. I'm not ready for that yet.

But none of what I am doing right now helps anything. And no matter how much I cry and bug Shipt over this, I am just not going to be hired. It is out of my hands.

I will just keep looking and keep walking, and keep praying.

I don't know what else to do.

Please send all your prayers and positive thoughts this way, because I surely need them today.

Thanks,
Kelly