471: I Believe in Santa

It is 11:18pm.

The kids are asleep.

Cookies for Santa have been put out, and carrots outside for the reindeer. (Reindeer have been a big deal this year at our house).

And the presents are under the tree.

In fact, I think the presents probably would pile over our little tree, if the tree wasn't on a table.

I have never stopped believing in Santa Claus, because somehow--even in our darkest hours-- he has find a way to make Christmas happen.

He works in mysterious ways and through loving people. He has always found a way to make sure that my children have a marvelous Christmas.

But sadly, everything that is on my personal Christmas list are things even Santa can't bring me.

My Christmas wish would be to wake up with a snoring 18 month old on my chest, telling him that Santa came and then watching him unwrap presents and laugh with his brothers--ignoring all the toys to play with boxes and paper.

My Christmas wish would be for miracles that ended all pain and grief for everyone and brought world peace--so that no one had to feel heartache on such a beautiful holiday.

My Christmas wish would be to be able to give everyone I know everything they needed to be happy and healthy.

Sadly I won't be able to do much of any of these things without real miracles...but I can continue to spread love for Elijah and keep my promise to him to change the world with his love. And I can send you all love and let you know that I care for each and everyone of you.

Again, thank you to all my friends and family who have made this Christmas a beautiful one so far. We are truly blessed to have all of you in our lives. I hope you and your families have a wonderful and safe Christmas.

And if you are lonely or hurting this Christmas, please know that you are not alone. If you are near me, feel free to send me a message and I would love to invite you over for some Gumbo! And we have more cookies than we could possibly eat lol. Or I am always here to talk. Please know that you have someone out there that cares about you.

Merry Christmas Eve everyone. Please continue to pray for our world. Pray for my family. Pray for me. And always always, pray for my sweet Elijah <3

Hi my sweet boy.

I got you a book for Christmas.

I know it is not much,

but I will add it to your little library I have started for you.

It is called, "The Gift of Nothing."

I know it sounds like a dreadful book,

but it is a really sweet book that talks about the gift of just having each other.

I will read it to you and your brothers tomorrow.

I love and miss you so much.

Sending you lots of Christmas love!!!

<3