Last night I went to sleep telling myself that today was going to be a better day...
And then I woke up and accidentally spilled hot water ALL over Julien while trying to make oatmeal this morning and left a giant burnt mark on his poor little front side.
He of course, being a hopelessly happy goofball, got over it with some pampering to his wounds and a box of popsicles-- but I felt miserable about it for a good long while.
To be honest, I was feeling defeated for a good part of the morning....
But then I decided that if he was okay, maybe I should be okay too.
So I folded the clean clothes, and then I gathered up dirty clothes and Alex and I brought them to my dad's to wash. While I was there I used my dad's internet to work on a vision board and study some interesting mind tricks that help you live a more positive and thankful lifestyle. (This is not something new I just decided to do, I have been studying the power of positivity since way before Elijah passed away.)
I felt better after leaving my dad and I came home and washed dishes, cooked dinner for everyone, bathed and read to the kids, and then worked on my next children's book.
I managed to get all the poems typed and formatted the way I wanted and even got two illustrations done.
I don't know...I guess where I was going with this is that today I made the choice to be productive again. I made the choice not to waste this gift of life that was given to me. Elijah will never live another day again on this Earth--but I could possibly have a whole lifetime ahead of me. I can not waste another day.
I am no longer going to stress over the 1000 projects I have created for myself. I am going to let them work themselves out. I will read and pray. I will experience new things, and then I know the right ideas will come to me. Until then, The Love Elijah Project will simply be me living my life and doing acts of kindness everyday for my sweet Elijah. Changing the world for him comes naturally. It is my passion. It is my love. It is what is in my heart. This is not me giving up, it is me taking my time to make sure I do what's right.
I have been blessed with some book ideas and the ability to make them a reality, so that is what I am going to focus on right now. Like I said, the rest will happen. And when it does, it will absolutely amazing.
Thank you guys for always being so supportive and reading my blog. Have a great night!
Please continue to pray for our world. Pray for my family. Pray for me. Pray for you. And always always, pray for my sweet Elijah.
Oh sweet boy.
You are still and always will be one of my biggest blessings.
And even on the really hard days,
I am so thankful to have you as my son.
I love you to the moon and back.
Always.
<3
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