Just keep praying...

It's 7:47pm.

I am bathtub blogging.

Today has been a day full of different emotions.

I had lunch with my friend Julie.

It was very nice to get to spend actual time with Julie.

We have been messaging each other a lot since Elijah's passing.

Julie lost her husband earlier this summer, shortly after Elijah was born...and actually shortly after my grandfather's death too.

We have always been friends, but lately we have kind of bonded over....well...death.

She has been an amazing help and I am so glad I have had her to talk to during some of my darkest moments.

I only hope I have been able to help her through some tough times as well.

I am thankful for our lunch together.

After our lunch, I went and mailed the letter and card to the mother I spoke of yesterday.

I found out later today that her situation has became an even bigger nightmare.

 I am not going to disclose any details, because my main concern for her has nothing to do with anything in her personal life other than the fact that her child died.

But please please please say a prayer for her and her sweet children tonight.

And while you are at it throw in a prayer for me and my family.

We are doing ok, and we are healthy and the kids are happy...but it doesn't make any of this easier.

I miss Elijah a lot.

It doesn't stop me from living my life. It won't stop me from pushing forward, I just am sad from time to time and need prayers.

Also, pray for Elijah. I know he is at peace, but I don't want him to ever feel forgotten. He is so so important.

I miss him so much.

Sweet Elijah.

Someone pointed out that your nostrils look like little hearts in this picture...

I kind of think they do <3

Gosh you were perfect.

Apparently too perfect for me.

It is not fair. It will never be fair. 

I guess i just have to wait until I make it to heaven one day....then I will hold you again. 

I just wish there was another way.

I miss you my boogie.