The Blank Space Kind Of Pain

It is 5:19pm.

I am exhausted.

I woke up early and did my two hour walk this morning, and I have another hour to walk a little later this evening--but I might have to sit that one out.

I think my body is still recovering from the beach and this awful sunburn.

I am trying to revamp the Love, Elijah blog and our etsy shop. I want to do more with it and this art studio, but I am kind of at a stand still right now.

But just know that I am trying.

Today I posted about August Birthday Remembrance cards and got a pretty good response.

I am also donating baskets from The Love, Elijah Project as part of a sponsorship for the Tears Rock and Walk in Port Orange, and I was debating holding a vendor's booth.

The sponsorship will help get the name of The Love, Elijah Project out there, and I was thinking the booth could help us raise awareness too--but I have no idea what I would sale or offer at this point and I kind of don't have a lot of time to decide.

Just like with everything else, I have to just keep pushing forward.

Anyways, the homeschooling with the kids is getting a little easier. We have found some supplemental activities here and there while we are still waiting on some materials to come in the mail. And they have taken to it pretty well too.

I am enjoying spending the time with them and watching them grow and learn.

But every time I have to list their names for some new account or new game there is always a sadness that overcomes me when I realize I will never ever put Elijah's name down for any of these things.

That is the kind of pain that will never go away....the blank space kind of pain.

I just miss him.

Well, I'm going to probably skip this evening's walk and just be lazy.

My thighs feel like they were fried extra crispy, and I am just drained everywhere.

Just keep praying. Pray for our world. Pray for Louisiana. Pray for my family. Pray for me. And always always, pray for my sweet Elijah.

You are one of the most important things to me.

I will never forget you.

I could never forget you.

And with every blank space, or empty line, I dread leaving you out.

You will ALWAYS be a part of this family Elijah.

ALWAYS.

I love you so much my boogie.

Miss you.