Thursday, May 18, 2017

615: More...

It is 8:58pm.

This morning I went to the local mental health clinic for a walk in appointment.

To be honest I was really nervous about it, but in the room where I was doing my initial screening interview there was a picture of a giant sunflower and it made me feel slightly better.

Also, there was door that was decorated with Peanuts characters, and of course I saw my little Linus and that made me feel a lot better.

I got some help signing up for medicaid, and I have 2 more appointments coming up. One I think is a meeting with a counselor. But I don't get to see a doctor until July.

But it is progress I suppose. I am taking the step in the right direction to take better care of myself again.

The kids have doctor's appointments tomorrow.

But for tonight, I want to share a little bit more of my book with you.

AGAIN, please remember that while I might be good at coming up with stories I stink at spelling and grammar. And I know there are lots of things that need to be fixed..this is not a final draft.

Also, please remember that this is my original work and I would appreciate you not copying ;) Thanks a bunch:


Kelly sank back into her pillow, trying to shake off her annoying neighbor.

She picked up her notebook and pencil. 

Staring blankly at the wall, she began to chew on the dull yellow writing utensil. Several minutes passed in silence. She couldn’t think of anything other than how much she missed her son. 

Before she could lose herself anymore in the damaging daydreams that plagued her racing mind, the doorbell rang again.
And again.

“Seriously?” Kelly dropped her notebook down beside her.

“Just ignore it,” Levi groaned from under the sheets.

But the bell rang again.

Kelly looked to Levi, who pulled the sheets down and revealed his face.

“You want me to get it, don’t you?” 

Kelly nodded silently.

“Fine.” 

Levi stood up and made his way to the door. He swung it open to find some kid standing there selling cupcakes. 

He stumbled back into the bedroom to get his wallet. Kelly just rolled her eyes. 

Her thoughts drifted back to Elijah. Would his dream have been to be a baker too? Would they have opened a family bakery together? What would they be whipping up in the kitchen if he were here now?

 Levi handed the kids at the door some money, took two vanilla cupcakes with sprinkles and then closed the door and locked it.

He walked back to the bed, unwrapped the paper from the cupcake and shoved half of it in his mouth leaving a ring of icing around his mouth. He sat on the bed and handed Kelly the other one.


“You’re kidding me. Right? Your name is Angel?” Elijah said unapologetically to the girl he had just met.

“No. Not kidding. That is my name. If you don’t like it you can blame my parents,” Angel snapped back as if she had been asked this question only a thousand times before.

“Huh,” Elijah wiped he left over cupcake crumbs from his mouth. “I know everyone here today. But I’ve never seen you before,” Elijah continued,  “Am I supposed to know you?”

“Not sure,” she answered, “But I saw that there was a party so I thought I would join the fun. You don’t mind- do you?”

“Guess not,” Elijah shrugged.

The party was full of gentle giants and mellow monsters. There were humans and animals and mystical creatures all enjoying the beach together. Stars were twinkling in the sunny sky. Rainbows painted the mountains in the distance. Anything was possible.

“You look bored,” Angel bluntly stated.

Elijah didn’t know what to say. He was somewhat pleased with the party. And he knew his parents had always taught him to be grateful and polite, but he was bored. This was not the surprise he was hoping for, and to be quite honest he was finding it hard to celebrate the anniversary of leaving his parents in devastation.

“I guess I just don’t understand what we are celebrating,” Elijah shrugged. 

“Your at peace! You have endless joy. There are no more worries. The Heavens are a wonderful place to be.” Angel danced a little jig and laughed. 

“I know…but,” Elijah started to explain. 

“Shhh,” Angel stopped him with a finger on his lips. “I know.” 

“Come with me,” she grabbed Elijah’s hand and lead him away from the party. 

As they moved further away from the merry laughter and dancing of the people at the party, and tiptoed past the majestic unicorns and other fine beasts, Angel lead them into a quiet fragrant field of lavender flowers. 

It was a like they had entered an ocean of soft purple. They paused for a moment so that Angel could point out the fairies and fireflies dancing in between the sweet floral landscape. Elijah had never seen this part of the heavens before. 

The two clumsy children continued along until they reached a large fluffy cloud. Suddenly things began to feel familiar for Elijah again. Then Angel waved her hands above the cloud and created a small opening.

“Wait are we?” Elijah asked abruptly. 

Once again Elijah was interrupted by Angel, “At the giving cloud? Yes.”

“But where are my sunflowers? Where is my dirt road? Why doesn’t it smell like my mom’s pancakes?”  

“Oh boy. You are such a newbie,” Angel giggled followed by a dorky snort, “There is so much for you to learn.”

Elijah couldn’t help but laugh at this clumsy girl, but he was so confused. He had been to the giving cloud hundreds of times with his giant and it had always been the same scenery: a sea of golden sunflowers and a dirt road lined with pebbles, stumps and leaves. All of that was gone now. He did not recognize this place. 

“You miss them don’t you?” Angel sat down on the cloud.

“Yes.” Elijah sighed.

“You know how I know?” Angel asked gently. 

Elijah sat down on the cloud and looked down at the beautiful scenery of endless space below.

“How?” There was a bit of a pause as Elijah waited for his answer. 

“My parents are down there too.”

They sat in silence for a while just staring down to the Milky Way. Space was almost as beautiful as Heaven with shooting stars and colorful planets. The quasars played with the nebulas as the satellites danced dangerously with the black holes. Space really was a magical divider of The Heavens and Earth. 

“Why can’t I see them?” Elijah asked with a slight panic in his voice. “I have always seen them before.”

“Oh newbie,” Angel giggled and snorted again, “When you come to the giving cloud are you ever alone?”

“No. My giant is always with me.” Elijah thought about this for a moment, but couldn’t make any sense of it. The Giants were not magical, and Elijah’s Giant was a bumbling annoyance at best. Did he really have to rely on him to use the giving cloud forever? 

And why couldn’t he just see his parents?


Kelly and Levi sat in bed eating their cupcakes.

“Well, I guess the door could have rang for more annoying reasons,” she took another bite of as Levi collapsed on the bed beside her, “I think I could eat a thousand cupcakes today.’’

“I could eat a mountain of brownies,” Levi suggested.

Comfort food could never bring their son back, but it never sounded better to the exhausted couple. And baking is what Kelly did best. 

Levi jumped to his feet and grabbed Kelly’s hands. He brought her into the kitchen and started to pull out the rainbow colored mixing bowls, spoons, eggs, flour, and sugar. 

“Let’s celebrate him. Okay?” he said in a desperate attempt to make Kelly smile. “We have to celebrate him. He is still our son and we can not let death win.”

“Ok,” Kelly lent a weak smile, “Let’s make some cupcakes.”

“And brownies?” Levi added ever so sweetly and pathetically.

“And brownies.” Kelly agreed.


“So the giants are magical?” Elijah had to ask.

“Oh gosh no,” Angel exclaimed. Her giggle snort was growing less enduring to Elijah as his serious side started to show again, “Their amulets are.”

“Their necklaces?” Elijah was just trying to clarify as he was still a little confused as to why these  graceless monsters could hold such responsibilities. “But why the giants?”

“Who knows,” Angel said carelessly. “Everyone up here has a purpose. And now that you are past your first year, you will soon learn yours.”

Elijah felt like he had to ask, “What is your purpose?”

Angel sat up straight and proudly stated, “I am a sky painter.” 

“What’s that?” Elijah asked.

Slightly annoyed at the boy’s ignorance she boasted, “Sky painters add color to the skies at sunset, and send rainbows during the storms. We bring peace in the quiet moments and the promise of a new day,”

Elijah agreed that Angel was a perfect fit for her purpose. She was very colorful and always seemed to be full of joy. 


The wheels in his head started to turn. If only he could be assigned the purpose of being a guardian of the giving cloud, then he could see his parents anytime he wanted. He could break all the rules that separated them. 

Surely if a goofy monster could win the trust to guard the giving cloud, then surely he could. He had to figure out a way to convince the creator that this was his purpose. But before he could get too lost in his thoughts, Angel stood up and waved her hand back over the giving cloud.

“We should probably get you back to your party I’m sure people are starting to wonder where you are.”

The two kids romped back through the fields of flowers and the fairy dust and quietly snuck back into the party. But not quietly enough not to be noticed.

“Boy!” Elijah’s giant spotted him. “Boy. Where have you been?”

“I was with a friend,” Elijah sighed. The Gentle Giant was assigned to take care of him in the absence of his parents. Just like most guardian and child relationships there was a constant battle when it came to obedience and respect. 

Elijah often wished that his Giant were more lenient with him like other guardians to the children of The Heavens, but really had no choice other than to respect the position he was in.

“You must stay close,” the Giant put his hand on the boy’s shoulder sternly, “You have much to learn soon, and I can not have you running off unannounced.”

“Fine,” Elijah shrugged the silly beast off and made his way to the refreshment table to join his new friend and Grandpa Gus. 

Grandpa Gus seemed to be trying seemed to escape the bickering of his two wives for a moment.

Out of all the relatives Elijah had met while in The Heavens, Grandpa Gus was his favorite. In his Earthly life, Gus was an archeologist and had traveled the world. He had discovered hidden villages and dinosaur bones. He had written books and always had great stories of adventures.

“You kids look like you are looking for an excitement,” Grandpa suggested.

“Oh yes! I do love to have fun,” Angel said as she poured herself another glass of punch.

“What did you have in mind?” Elijah asked, looking over his shoulder to make sure his overprotective Giant wasn’t able to hear. 

“Well I was in the great library late last night, looking for a good read and I found something I want to show you,” Gus began to whisper, “But maybe we better go somewhere more private.”

“But my Giant,” Elijah started to explain.


“Your Giant won’t mind you spending some time with you Grandpa on such an important day!” Gus smiled as he led the two curious children back out of the party and past the gentle creatures of the heavens once again.



Alright you guys, I am going to read with the kids a little bit, write a little bit and then go get some sleep.

I love you all so much! Please keep following those dreams and live what you love.

And keep praying for our world. Pray for our country. Pray for my family. Pray for me. Pray for you! And always always pray for my sweet Elijah.

Thank you.


Hey my boogie.
Look at those little eyes and that little nose.
I just want to hold you in my arms again.
I love you so much.
Always.
<3 

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