Grief Day #876

It is 9:42pm.

I am currently listening to Audio Slave.

Chris Cornell is singing, "Be yourself. It's all that you can do."

Tonight, I am the me that is a mess.

I am the me that is wallowing in my grief--even though I know better.

I am the me that should really should be painting, but is so distracted.

I am the me that is trying to let it go, but for some reason is holding on.

I am the me that just took two Benadryl and is waving the white flag for tonight...It is time to meditate and pray like Hell until I fall asleep.

Tomorrow I will play catch up on my paintings. I really want to be done with my illustrations, but I also want to be in the right place emotionally to paint them.

Luckily, the painting I did today matched my mood lol.

This is not the finished product, it was a picture I took earlier today...

No need to worry about me. Just send love. It was just a tough morning, that kind of lead to a tough day. There were still many good moments to be thankful for. And of course, I am forever hopeful.

Sending you guys all lots and lots of love. I know I am not the only one who faces tough days. Big hugs!

Keep praying for our world. Pray for our Earth. Pray for each other. Pray for our families. Pray for our children. Pray for hope. Pray for peace. Pray for love. Pray for you! Pray for me. And always always pray for my sweet sweet Elijah.

Thank you!

You made me so happy,

You make me so happy.

I just miss you so much.

I love you Elijah.

Always.

<3