I started on some etsy orders tonight, and I have one more I am going to make tonight and then tomorrow I will be literally making over 100 bracelets, so I might be a little busy-- to say the least.
I better find some good documentaries to watch...
But as I have learned, busy is good.
I don't want to ever be distracted from my thoughts of Elijah, I just want to be distracted from the thoughts of him not being here.
I honestly don't have a clue where today went.
I know I cleaned the studio this morning and fought with my kids over tablets all morning...and then the rest of the day has just kind of blurred together.
We have been trying to take away the tablets during the daytime, and hoping that we can maybe lessen their screen time.
After we lost Elijah, we fell victim to electronic parenting, because most days we couldn't even take care of ourselves.
I am still guilty of a lot of absent parenting, but I am slowly getting better at being more present.
It is not easy though.
Not that I don't love my boys....oh my God...my boys are my world...I just have a hard time doing anything and everything most days.
But we get through it. And I think the important thing is that we get through it as a family.
Even on the harder days where I am angry and they are out of control, we still manage to get through it and move forward together.
"Family First."
I just wish it was the whole family.
Just keep praying. Pray for me--I have a tooth ache and it sucks. Pray for my family. Pray for the world. And always always always, pray for my Elijah. (please and thank you)
Hi my little sunflower.
Hi my sweet boy.
Hi my Elijah.
I have felt you today.
I don't know why, but I feel like our connection is strong today,
but I still miss you.
You have no idea the ways I miss you.
We all do.
Love you my boogie.
Always
<3
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