Today is day 5 of The Capture Your Grief project.
The them today was: The Unspoken.
Here is the picture I posted and what I wrote:
Day Five: The Unspoken.
I have blogged every single day since Elijah passed.
Every single day I have posted his picture.
And even still, there are things left unsaid. In fact you wouldn't believe all the things I can't even put into words.
I really can't imagine people will ever understand unless it happens to them, but I wouldn't wish any of this on my worst enemy.
But, I have been told by other people that my other kids need their own identities and that I should probably stop using hashtags like #elijahsbrothers or #elijahsfamily. (Nevermind that they actually do have their own identities and Elijah is still their brother.) I have been told I should just go back to work. (Despite my efforts to go back to work and the ulcers and anxiety it has caused me)
I have been told some pretty nasty things about what people believe I should and shouldn't be doing with my life and my grief...which I will continue to keep unspoken because it hurts too much to talk about.
But Elijah is my son. He is a part of our family. He is important to us. And no matter how much it bothers other people, I will always speak about him and include him in everything my family does.
-----------------------------------
The boys are still at Levi's mom's house.
Today Levi and I drove to Monroe to get Granny a toilet tank cover, but couldn't find one anywhere.
So we ended up walking around the mall and either I am just super broke or super old, because the mall has just lost all its luster lol.
Then we went to the bookstore to use the internet and again, it was too slow to upload my book...so hopefully tomorrow I will be able to do it at Levi's mom's house.
But we did get some good news on our housing situation, so that brought a little bit of relief.
Anyways, short blog tonight. I really don't like having to use my phone to blog. My fat fingers are clumbsy and it makes it hard to type lol.
Please pray for Haiti and all who have already been hit by this hurricane. Also, please pray for Florida and all the other areas that are about to get hit.
All of our friends in Florida are in my thoughts and prayers right now. Love you all!!!
And as always, pray for our world. Pray for my family. Pray for me. And always always pray for my sweet Elijah.
Thank you.
Hi sweet boy.
Hi my sunflower.
Someone posted today that one day on Earth was the equivalent to one minute in Heaven. I hope this is for real.
It is a very comforting thought anyway.
I love and miss you so much.
Always
<3
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