Sometimes we fall down.

Today is a hard day.

Today I feel like a failure.

Today I got caught in a lie.

It hurts.

Not because I got caught, but because I feel like in a pretty huge way, I failed.

We are currently behind on our rent. And as much as I just wanted it to be my problem and put all the worries on my shoulders, I decided I was going to tell my husband we were all caught up to ease his worries...and then the landlord came by.

About 2 months ago, our "roommate" gave me a hot check, which sent our bank account in to a nasty negative balance. Ever since then has paid late and in partial payments. It has screwed with our finances beyond belief. Even with help from parents, my finances just snowballed into an ugly situation, but one I was pretty sure I could get us out of. And I'm still pretty sure I can get caught up on this month.

But the real bad part of this situation is that I betrayed my husband's trust in me, and I also did something I know is wrong.

Sometimes I just want to be so strong that I carry everybody's burdens so that they don't have to.

Sometimes I am really naive.

Sometimes I fall down.

I want to be giving, and loving, and preach kindness, but that does not make me anywhere near perfect.

I am just hoping that from reading this blog post you can learn that no matter where you are in your life, you are going to make mistakes, and you are going to fall. It will hurt, and you will be disappointed in yourself, and even worst others might be disappointed in you.

Above all else, if you are in a tough situation, turn to honesty. And forgive yourself when you make bad choices. Life will be easier if you do these things.

I am truly sorry for hiding our financial situation and I am truly sorry for lying. I love my husband, and in the future I guess I will just have to take my "hero" cape off and let him in, even in the hard times.

Sorry to be such a Debby Downer...

In brighter news, Alex is on day 2 of his Day Camp at Disney.

(This is him being silly waiting in the car for drop off time)

Today he is going to Animal Kingdom to ride Expedition Everest, Kali River Rapids, and then back to do more rat training.

He seems to be loving it, which is great. He needs some enjoyment in his life. We all do.

Oh and the Back to School Drive is still on for Friday 10:30-1:30 at Cagan' Crossings Library Room B.

If you want to donate, you know the drill....yellow button on the right hand corner.

Thanks for reading,

Be kind,

Kelly Airhart